I could answer this question in so many ways. There are countless articles published about this very topic, but for now this is more of an introspection of my response than a quest to find the actual answer. I mean ladies, does this sound familiar? You could be minding your own business just hanging out with the t.v. on and before you know it, the channel has been magically changed to golf?
Wait, I don't watch golf, what the hell happened? Just because my undivided attention isn't consumed by the t.v. doesn't mean I wasn't paying attention to what I picked out. Women are amazing multi-taskers. I don't know about you, but I'm able to fold laundry, talk on the phone and watch t.v. all at the same time. Somehow, with all my multitasking abilities, my partner seems to poses a magical power of his own. That's sneaking the remote and turning the channel to what he wants to watch and maintaining control over the t.v. for the rest of the day.
This happens all the time! I usually give into it because I feel like spending time together watching whatever ends up on the screen is more important than arguing over it. I try to justify it by saying, "I don't like t.v. anyway," or "I have other things to do besides watching t.v."
After a time, I realize that sitting together, watching the screen isn't spending time together at all. When guys watch t.v., they watch t.v! No talking allowed! So I get sick of watching golf and usually end up doing laundry or cleaning because I feel like I don't deserve to just sit and veg out until these things are done.
Why, oh why, do I feel this way? Its like a computer program in me that automatically ensues when a certain sequence of events happens... I'm watching t.v., leads to... program gets changed to what he wants to watch, leads to... "I must not deserve to be watching what I want," leads to finding something "productive" to do.
Why do I feel like if the t.v. is turned from what I'm watching, its my cue to do some dishes or clean the floor? It drives me insane! Recently, I've tried to boycott my regular responses by forcing myself to sit and watch whatever is on and I feel like a lazy bum. Most of all, I feel GUILTY!
Please correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like a common feeling in women is guilt. Why do we bear the burden of the world through this feeling? Not just with the microcosmic example of dealing with who gets the remote, but with EVERYTHING!!! Personally I hate it. I don't quite know how to confront this, but I know as women, it is an epidemic that plagues us all.
Today as I was in Church, they discussed how in the world stay at home moms are considered less than or not as important when it comes to jobs and job titles, when in all actuality it is one of the hardest jobs there are. I sat and pondered for a minute and realized how i feel "guilty" a lot in my life. For example, I feel the guilt for not having a job outside the home and feel less of a person for it. So as I was thinking about these things it came to me that feeling guilty is a weakness of mine and perhaps in other women as well. We Women, by nature, tend to take on the world and put it on our shoulders and when its not done we feel the guilt. I guess the only solution is to (definitely not leave it up to the guys) look within our own individual selves and give the burdens and the guilt we feel up to the Lord. After all hes the only one that can save the world anyway.:)
ReplyDeleteI really like the idea of giving the burden away!
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